Author Archive

Thursday, January 08th, 2009 | Author: Jason

 

I finally finished my book. Well, it’s a collection of fictionalized stories from my youth. A memoir, but told the way I remember it, rather than the way it happened. I’ll probably edit it for the next five years. Here are the opening paragraphs from a story.

The town I was born in, three thousand people and three stop lights, was too big, too hurried , and too civilized for my father, so when I was five years old, he moved us out to the country. My dad knew a family from our church who owned acres upon acres of barren pine about fifteen miles out from the city limits, and like most Christian revivalists, that family wanted to escape the corruption of the world they were born into and found a new community, a New Canaan, a shining city on a hill.

My dad bought into that promise of renewal, and with it came a few acres of his own in the burgeoning community. He paid a man with a Caterpillar to bulldoze a one-lane dirt road from the highway out into the far edge of New Canaan. Mr. Banner, the man with bulldozer, charged my dad five hundred dollars and one jar of moonshine to cut the trail, clear cut an acre or so, and haul away the underbrush. Aside from that one acre clearing, he left the rest of the land as it was, a muddy creek bed, sickly pine trees, swamp land, and misquito breeding grounds. Dad paid the city to bring in electricy, running water, and sewage. He would have been happy to live by candlelight, water well and outhouse, but my mother insisted, so we hauled civilization out into the sticks, kicking and screaming all the way.

 

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Friday, November 21st, 2008 | Author: Jason

I was doing some ego searches this morning and found some photos of the Threespot office taken by Tracey Gaughran-Perez (Sweetney), of the Baltimore Gaughran-Perezs. Enjoy!

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Tuesday, November 18th, 2008 | Author: Jason
  • I don’t like Deerhoof as much as I should. They sound like a drunk Blonde Redhead. #
  • Writing the script for the “death of SEO” powerpoint presentation I gave a week ago. #
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Monday, November 17th, 2008 | Author: Jason
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Thursday, November 06th, 2008 | Author: Jason

Continuing Signs of the Apocalypse

Two of my least favorite things, incessant advertising and airport security theater are about to be combined. For the love of God, is ther e no place in America free from advertising?!

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Wednesday, November 05th, 2008 | Author: Jason

Conservatives who threaten to move to Germany after the Obama win are just as childish and petulant as liberals who threatened to move to France after the Bush win. Stay in America and fix the country you claim to love.

— Me, Right Now.

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Wednesday, October 29th, 2008 | Author: Jason

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Wednesday, October 22nd, 2008 | Author: Jason

Al Bundy gets an Obama tax cut.

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Monday, September 22nd, 2008 | Author: Jason

Judging from the Live in Phoenix album, Fall Out Boy is the worst live band ever. Great albums… horrible live.

Bonus… also contains the worst cover of Beat It ever put to tape.

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Tuesday, August 19th, 2008 | Author: Jason

I’ve been writing a “what I’ve learned” birthday post for the last two weeks. For some reason, I can’t get it out… I know what to say, but I have, for the first time in my life, writer’s block.  So, instead of writing it all at once, I think I’ll write it a little at a time.

What I’ve learned in 32 years on Earth:

  1. Never trust a woman with a neck tattoo.
  2.  Never gamble more than you can afford to lose.
  3. Speaking of gambling, never gamble against a person named after a city.
  4. Judge a man by his haircut and a woman by her shoes.
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